When your ex boyfriend makes the move to start dating again, it may feel like he’ s pressing a knife straight through your coronary heart. Obviously, this only applies in case you’ re still carrying the torch for the man.
We are all familiar with the infamous ‘ honey-do’ list. The never-ending litany of minor projects and tasks that people (usually wives and girlfriends) create for each other to do every weekend or day off. But beyond the typical chore list, most couples also have another list, an emotional ‘ honey-do’ list of kinds.
Having a great week? It may lead to healthier options. If you are a man with HIV, you might be more likely to use a condom during sex. In the new study, researchers at Columbia University’ s Mailman School of Public Health report that HIV-positive men whose moods improved inside a given week were more likely to have safe sex than they would inside a normal week. In weeks where moods were worse than usual, they were more likely to have unprotected sex.
Results show up online in the journal Health Psychology .
The Mailman School researchers are the first to look at sexual risk as it relates to changes in mood, instead of general level of depression. Over six weeks, 106 sexually active, HIV-positive males who have sex with men living in New York completed weekly surveys that will asked about their sexual behavior, depression, and wellbeing during the prior 7 days. Overall, 66% of study participants reported having unprotected anal sexual intercourse in the prior two months; 81% had multiple partners.
Three-quarters of the study participants were dark and Latino men, a group disproportionately affected by HIV. According to the Centers pertaining to Disease Control, a quarter of all new HIV infections in the country are in dark and Latino men, and 45% in New York City. While the rate of new HIV infections has plateaued overall, for black and Latino males who have sex with men, HIV infections are on the rise.
Healthier choices could make an enormous difference. “ There is real issue about high rates of unguaranteed sex happening among gay males, which may be driving increases in the rate of HIV infection, ” says first author Patrick A. Wilson, PhD, associate professor of Sociomedical Sciences at the Mailman School. “ For this reason, it’ s urgent that we understand what drives sexual risk behavior in vulnerable groups so we will find ways to minimize it. ”
The researchers found that the men they surveyed who documented an increase in their wellbeing in a provided week were more likely to have safe sex (66%), compared to a normal 7 days (46%). The inverse also kept true: those who reported higher-than-usual degrees of depression were more likely to engage in the risk behaviors (69%).
The particular researchers found that the men they surveyed who reported an increase within their wellbeing in a given week were more likely to have safe sex when compared with a normal week. The inverse furthermore held true: those who reported higher-than-usual levels of depression were more likely to engage in the risk behaviors.
Previous studies found that depression plus emotional wellbeing had little effect on sexual risk-taking, and may even have reduced risk (one explanation was that depression sapped energy for sexual risk-taking). The new study suggests that changes in mood matter more than typical psychological state. “ We all have bad days and good days, plus bad weeks and good days. That’ s life. But it ends up that how moods change can be a big factor in influencing condom make use of, ” says Dr . Wilson.
It’ s not yet known if there is a common theme to what made the men feel better or depressed. One reason may be daily uplifts and hassles. But more serious social stressors and economic struggles may also impact the wellbeing in this particular group. For example , being stigmatized by a family member or stressed from being unable to pay the rent may lead to depression (men in the survey were on lower end of the income spectrum).
Another unanswered question: How exactly do moods lead to healthy or unhealthy choices? Maybe increased wellbeing buffers against stressors males experience that can lead to a fatalistic outlook in which they throw caution to the wind. On the other hand, says Doctor Wilson, “ They might think in bad weeks, ‘ I don’ t have much of a life to live, anyway. I have to deal with finding meals today or a place to stay. HIV is the least of my issues. ’ ”
“ Or maybe they don’ t possess the power to negotiate safe sex pertaining to themselves, ” adds co-author Gertraud Stadler, PhD, associate research man of science in Sociomedical Sciences at the Mailman School. “ When you’ re depressed you’ re less able to stand up for yourself. ”
The arrow might also point the other direction: Unprotected sex could lead to feeling depressed. However , other studies have suggested that negative feelings like sense of guilt after unprotected sex are uncommon. “ Mostly our participants described these sexual encounters as positive, ” notes Dr . Wilson.
Designing an intervention to fit with the study’ s findings may prove difficult. “ We’ ve learned that there isn’ t a high-risk group of depressed people that we can easily identify and treat, ” says Dr . Stadler. “ Rather we have to intervene when they are feeling worse than usual since that’ s when the risk occurs. ” One futuristic intervention she envisions might resemble the movie “ The girl, ” where a smart phone is able to recognize depression by changes in vocal intonation or textual cues.
Another approach would be to train the men how to maintain wellbeing. “ It boils down to coping — recognizing your emotions and how to respond when they modify, ” says Dr . Wilson, adding that the group’ s socioeconomic status also plays in. People are often able to regulate their emotions because they have stable jobs, housing, plus support networks, he says. “ The structural intervention is needed to address the particular adverse conditions these men are in. ”
Could the particular findings apply more broadly using gay and straight couples? More studies are needed, but “ the idea of sexual risk influenced by variances in mood is likely consistent throughout groups, ” says Dr . Wilson. Economic theory may provide a clue, adds Dr . Stadler. “ Daniel Kahneman and Amos Tversky gained the Nobel Prize for their function showing that when a person experiences reduction — something akin to worsened mood — they are more likely to take dangers. Likewise, when people feel they have obtained something, they are less likely to take dangers. ”
February 12, 2014
Relationships have an obvious turn to them. They’ re constantly changing and it’ s up to the people in them to change as well. When that doesn’ t happen, the relationship turns into mundane and stilted. The few loses interest in one another and what had been once a passionate love affair now turns into a quiet, platonic friendship. Eventually a rest up occurs. Sometimes, one person isn’ t ready to let go yet and they also live with a constant desire to get back with their ex. If you’ re that individual, you have to learn about the power of invert psychology.
Using reverse psychology to get your ex back makes perfect sense. Up to this point you’ ve already been considering that the ideal way to win him or her back is to pour our your heart to them. Telling them everything you feel seems logical, doesn’ to it? After all, if they fully understand the particular depth of your feelings, how could they ever consider ending details for good? They will. Immediately after a break upward, your ex is dealing with a lot of conflicting feelings as well and they don’ to want to have to bear the burden of your confessions of undying love.
Here’ s what you’ lso are going to do to get your ex back again. Before you do anything else you’ lso are going to give yourself a little pep talk. Tell yourself why you’ re so desirable and the reason why your ex loved you so much at once. You’ re very worthy of their particular love and they have just lost view of that. If you believe this, you’ ll be well on your way to obtaining them back.
Right now your ex is planning on the phone to ring at any second and for it to be you pleading them to take you back. You may have already done this at some point. If you did, it’ s okay. It’ s just not something you’ ll ever do it again again.
You need to start acting as though you’ re completely great with the break up. You have to move forward as though you’ re embracing your new existence on your own. That means staying away from your ex for several weeks. If you do run into them, become friendly, kind and most of all, joyful. A smile on your face, and not a tear in your eye will be priceless when it comes to getting an ex girlfriend or boyfriend back.
By acting disinterested in rekindling the lost romance, you’ re essentially displaying your ex that you can make it without them. They’ ll feel that deeply because it’ s a sign that you’ re emotionally detaching from them. It’ s important though because it will make them see how much you really do mean to them.
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Jan 16, 2014
After a break up if you’ re still in love with your ex, you’ re going to look for any glimmer of hope that she still feels the same way about a person. It’ s hard enough wanting to end up being with someone who you’ re no more with. It’ s even more annoying if she just doesn’ to feel the same way about you. Obviously, walking up to her and asking her if she wants a person back isn’ t going to function. She’ ll probably turn and walk away. Instead, you’ re likely to have to use your own detective abilities to figure out what’ s really going on in her heart and brain. Fortunately, there are some signs your ex girlfriend misses you that will help. If you notice any of these in her behavior, you have to get to work getting her back in love with you.
Here are some indications your ex girlfriend misses you:
She tells you she does. This seems incredibly obvious several men don’ t truly be familiar with gravity of it. You may overlook it when she says she misses you because you assume she’ s i9000 just being polite or kind. She’ s not. She’ s i9000 telling you because it’ s exactly what she feels in her heart.
She contacts you regularly. If she’ s the one who also calls you or sends you normal texts or emails, take that as a strong sign that she’ s not close to being more than you yet. If she were, the contact would completely end. Women don’ t spend their own time engaging men they don’ t care for. It just doesn’ t work that way.
She talks about yesteryear. If your ex girlfriend enjoys bringing up things that you two used to do or when she seems focused on when you two were happy and in love, that’ s an indicator that she wants to rekindle that part of your own relationship. She may actually be bringing up those things in the hope of gauging how you’ ll react.
She’ s remorseful. If she’ s forthcoming with the fact that this wounderful woman has serious regrets regarding how the relationship ended up, that shows she still cares for you. She wishes the past were different because she still cares very deeply for you. If she tells you that she’ s apologies, that’ s a sign that your feelings and perception of her matter.
If you spot any of these signs and you’ re still just as wild about your ex girlfriend while you ever were, it may be time to try to win her back. If you’ re both on the same page concerning a future together, you should be able to convince her to give you another chance.
What does it take to become a good lover? There are those who think that every time you have sex it will be good(if you believe that one, I have a bridge in New York to sell you for cheap). The truth is most sexual encounters are mediocre at best.
Precisely why? Because many believe that to be good at something all you need to do is show up. A good athlete will move into greatness just because he shows up for the game. A boxer because he makes it into the ring. But how many “ good” athletes have lost the big match or big game because they discovered great wasn’ t good enough.
When it comes to love between a husband and wife or two people who are in like and seeking to express themselves sexually there exists a need to go from being average in order to good and good to great. The question is, how do you do that. I hope to provide a few pointers to men and women to assist in that endeavor.
1) Understand ladies are like crock pots and many men like microwaves – men are so ready to go at a moment’ s observe that a woman can still be cool whilst he is burning up with desire. Patience is a virtue when one engages in lovemaking.
2) Satisfy her first – men that seek to gain their pleasure first typically are too tired to do anything at all of value for the woman they love. Seek first to make sure she actually is taken care of so that you find your ultimate satisfaction in her pleasure.
3) Climaxes are not mandatory for women – a woman can enjoy the intimate experience immensely and yet not experience an orgasm. As a man you should be sensitive and see where she appears. If she is the type who wants the climax every time, give it to her. In case she does not want to have one, then cuddle touch and give her what she wants.
1) Understand many men like microwaves and women are just like crock pots – a man generally can heat up very quickly and many situations he only needs to see what attracts him to a woman to become turned on. Don’ t stir a man to action unless you are ready to take action with him. To do so with no wish to complete his desire is unfair.
2) Engage physically, vocally and emotionally – nothing turns a man off quicker than the usual woman who is engaged in lovemaking thinking “ are you done yet? ” If a man feels that it can destroy his intention to make sure you the woman he is with.
3) Climaxes are mandatory for a man – if you want to boost the man’ s ego, make sure he or she finishes in style. Otherwise he will become a frustrated soul.
Go get em, you tigers plus miss tigers.
Feb 14, 2014
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When it comes to sexy strippers, Questionnaire canâ€™t be faulted. The city offers a plethora of options for buckâ€™s evenings and special events, from the relatively mild to the positively eye opening. In addition to topless and full nude striptease shows, revellers can choose a range of choreographed performances featuring one or more strippers, each offering something totally different for the target audience.
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Tips for Booking Sexy Strippers within Sydney
If you are contemplating booking an x-rated stripper, sting bikini waitress or full nude striptease show for your special event, be sure to book early to get the best choice of ma?e. It will no doubt not come as a surprise to discover that Miss Nude Australia winners get booked fast, especially during the busy summer months. With such a wide variety of shows on offer, be adventurous and book something different to a full nude striptease show to find the most bang for your buck.
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